How to NOT become a millionaire

hot to not become a millionaire

There’s tons of websites and guides out there to help you get rich fast. Well here’s another list for you to read, but it has nothing to do with getting rich quick, or even getting rich at all. Here’s 7 ways to NOT become a millionaire as if we NEED more help with that!

  1. Don’t take advantage of your employer matched GRRSP contributions – This is an instant return on your investment, but you probably don’t want to do it because it’s a hassle or the management fees from the designated broker might be a little higher than your own Canadian Couch Potato Portfolio and you can do better without their money weighing you down. Turning down a 100% return to save 1% is a sure fire step to ensure you do not become a millionaire.
  2. Don’t negotiate a salary – Employers are ALREADY offering you more then your last job AND they said that’s as high as they’ll go, so you don’t want to make them angry by asking for more. In my day to day work I’ve had the pleasure of interviewing and sending job offers to people and they almost never negotiate their salary. This is fantastic from my point of view because I just got an employee on sale for that project.
  3. Stay in one job miserable job – After all you should be thankful you have one right? Some say that if you stay in your jobs for more than 2 years you can make about 50% less than those who don’t. So that’s a pretty quick way how to not become a millionaire just by staying put.
  4. Don’t teach yourself about personal finance – They don’t teach us anything in school for a good reason, right? Public school boards totally have our best interests in mind when it comes to teaching us life skills. I constantly use Pythagorean’s theorem and dissect small animals at my job.
    You’ll probably want to write down these books to make sure you never accidentally read them: The millionaire teacher, The Wealthy Barber Returns and well really just anything about money, don’t bother with it. School taught you enough, after all you came out of high school knowing how to file your taxes right?
  5. Keep up with the Joneses – They’re financing everything and so should you! After all it gives everyone the impression you’re doing so much better in life then they are and that’s how you want to live right? Leverage every purchase you make so the majority of your income is going to interest payments and while you’re at it make sure a few of those purchases are on credit cards. The quickest way to never be a millionaire is to always carry a balance from those designer goods on your credit cards so you rack up that 18-21% interest. If you’re paying enough interest each month that’s an excellent way to not become a millionaire!
  6. Invest in highly volatile stocks and trade with your gut – There’s people that study the markets and world trends for a full time job and they can’t predict how the markets will go, so trading with your gut is the best way to not become a millionaire, right? Just buy and sell as you see fit, you don’t need any training but if you’re going to take some training make sure it’s those from one of those get rich quick guys you might see paying models to promote on Instagram and on some YouTube channels. They’re definitely a scam, so they can certainly help you to not become a millionaire.
  7. Don’t learn from your mistakes and accept responsibility – Once filed for bankruptcy? It probably was just bad timing in the markets and will never happen again! Definitely repeat those same steps to ensure you’ll never become a millionaire.

There you have it guys, just 7 really easy simple steps you can repeat over and over again to make sure you do not become a millionaire. Obviously this is a terrible list to follow, who wouldn’t want to become a millionaire? If you realize each point’s sarcasm and pretty well do the opposite, you should have a relatively comfortable retirement provided you can do it over a long period of time. These are actually pretty common things people do all throughout their lives that if you just make small adjustments you can have a much more financially successful life without a lot of effort.

4 comments

  • A fun read Stephen! The one thing on this list that I struggle with is the salary negotiation – that ever terrifying question of “What are your compensation requirements?”. I completely agree that it is a great idea to go for more but unless you have a firm handle on what that position could command there is always a worry about pricing yourself out of contention. On the other hand, if you ever go to buy a used car and tell them your limit is $10,000 the first one they show it you inevitably going to be at least $13,000 so there is a selling technique that is common enough that it just might work!

    • There’s definitely a fine line but I believe there’s room for negotiation in every big deal you make, salary, home buying, car buying, it’s all expected I think so if you don’t push at least once then I think you lose immediately.
      Stephen recently posted…How to NOT become a millionaireMy Profile

  • Loved this article! I’m dying of all the sarcasm!

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